FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Season 1 Wrap-up

Sometime in early January (while in the shower), I came up with an idea that I hoped would catch on for DVD Panache. A take-off on a long-time feature in The Oregonian's entertainment magazine, I envisioned Friday Screen Test as a way to publicize fellow film bloggers while also adding my own personal touch. Most of all, I knew that my fellow bloggers could deliver the goods, with interesting answers that would keep people coming back week after week.

Last week was the 30th Friday Screen Test, and a good signing-off point for the first season of the series. To let me maximize my efforts on other projects here at DVD Panache, and to also set the stage for a re-tooled "2.0" version of Friday Screen Test, the series is being put on hiatus. I want to give huge thanks to everyone who participated, as well as those who enjoyed the series enough to read it regularly. I already have a few good names in the hat for Friday Screen Test's next go-around, and if you have a blog and some unique opinions, don't hesitate to drop me an email to let me know you're interested.

For the season wrap-up of Friday Screen Test, I've chosen a favorite or interesting line out of each week's entry. Here they are presented chronologically, starting with the very first one (the links take you to that person's Screen Test). Enjoy, and thanks for reading!


ANDY HORBAL: 'LSD + Night of the Living Dead = A lifetime of looking over your shoulder...'

PIPER: 'I bought the first season of Venture Brothers on DVD and I can't quit talking about that show. Everybody hates me because I always talk about it and how funny it is and subtle and brilliant.'

DVD GUY: 'Battlefield Earth made me quit Scientology.'

EDWARD COPELAND: 'I've always had great fondness for Julien Temple's Absolute Beginners, so much so that I've been afraid to ever revisit it for fear it might break the spell. As for the opposite, I'm not dumbfounded as to why I dislike them as much as I am as to why others like them (say, Dr. Zhivago or The Thin Red Line).'

PAUL MARTIN: 'The first film to really overwhelm me with a desire to discuss it with others was Lost Highway. I pestered my significant other that night, and the following two days discovered the power of the internet by researching it online. This was also the first film that I wrote a significant review on, which was only relatively recently.'

DAVID LOWERY: 'I've been in a myopic pursuit of the same career since I was seven years old. Of course, it was a movie that set me on that path, so I suppose the question could be rephrased as "Has there ever been a movie that made every other possible career seem entirely unappealing?" And the answer, as it would be for so many others in this line of work, would be Star Wars.'

JOSEPH B.: 'I've had a major affinity for director Tony Scott for years now, and I can't figure out why. I once wrote a 3000 word essay analyzing and dissecting his films (in the late 90's I believe, sadly lost 2 computers ago and a message board now floating in cyber space). So, when films like Domino, Enemy of the State or Deja Vu creep up on my favorites lists, it always baffles some people. And I have a hard time justifying that these films are more than popcorn action flicks.'

ALAN LOPUSZYNSKI: 'My brother spoiled the ending of The Empire Strikes Back for me, and after I watched it I wouldn't have minded having a group discussion with him and my fists and his breadbasket . . . that movie probably was one of my earliest subjects of film discussion with friends. All of us had cut our teeth on Star Wars and this rather soundly rocked our worlds.'

LUCAS MCNELLY: 'On the worst days, the recipe is something like this: pizza, several good beers, and Smokey and the Bandit (1977). Sequel as needed. Alternately, substitute in good wine and some Woody Allen.'

STACIE PONDER: 'Shark Attack 3: Megalodon is THE greatest bad movie in the history of ever. It's really an awful movie in virtually every respect, but it's also a SUCH joy to watch that it's become one of my favorite movies, period. The effects must simply be seen to be believed there's green screens and stock footage galore. I was literally on the floor at times, howling with laughter. The longer it goes on, the better it gets. I want to buy everybody in the whole world a copy; I want to introduce as many people to it as I possibly can; I want to make out with Shark Attack 3.'

DAMIAN ARLYN: 'I don't really believe in not finishing a movie once I've started it. The only time I've ever walked out of a film halfway through it was when I was forced to do so by the people I went to see it with (my family). The movie was Super Mario Bros. I didn't particularly like it up until that point but I didn't hate it either. Years later I actually finished it. We didn't miss anything.'

TUWA: 'I've probably adopted more [dialogue] of Seinfeld and The Simpsons, though for awhile I was fond of "just put that anywhere"; and "he's a good man, and thorough."

TED PIGEON: 'Andy Horbal recently wrote that he considers film study less and less a relexation or hobby, but more like a job. That's essentially how I feel. I keep a log of everything I see and hold a list of films I'd like to see in the future. I try to keep a rigiorous schedule but I don't always stick to it. Right now, I'd guess I see on average about three movies a week. I do, however, see movies in pieces more now, which has been a really interesting way of seeing films. I try never to watch a movie in pieces the first time I see it, but I think it is essential to see movies you're familiar with broken down. It's a great way of getting into the mechanics of the film and to understand how it's doing what it's doing.'

DENNIS COZZALIO: 'It wasn’t central to my decision to pursue a career as a teacher (a career path upon which I am just now embarking), but seeing Nicholas Philibert’s �tre et avoir (To Be and to Have) a couple of years ago helped to rekindle a dormant interest I had in teaching that has now fully reawakened. I want to see this movie again very soon.'

CHRIS STANGL: 'Summer evening 1957, drive-in theater, black & white ’55 Bel Air convertible, girl in tight sweater in passenger seat, Attack of the Crab Monsters double-billed with Not of This Earth. This is where you go when you die. I would willingly chop off a finger to go back in time and experience this.'

THOM RYAN: 'As a teenager I once sneaked a bottle of beer into a small theater showing a midnight movie. I was just trying to impress my friends ("stupid is as...etc."). I had the bottle hidden in my coat and it slipped out. The screening room had a bare concrete floor so there was a crash, and glass and beer everywhere. The worst part was that they hadn't brought the house lights down yet so everyone in the place (including the management who were not amused) knew I did it. I was invited to find the nearest exit. Embarrassing but true.'

STEVE CARLSON: 'I'd do a whole month of Midnight Kink -- midnight showings of movies with oddball sexuality. I'd try not to leave anything out, either. From S&M (Maitresse and Sick) to transvestiteism (Glen or Glenda?) to transexualism (Let Me Die a Woman) all the way to necrophilia (Nekromantik) and bestiality (The Wedding Trough), plus a few catch-alls (Visitor Q, The Telephone Book, a '70s porno roughie or two)... I'd try and represent all I could. Just seeing the crowds that showed up would be entertaining enough.'

SQUISH LESSARD: 'Before I received a tome called 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die for Christmas 2005, I was more a contemporary modern day film fan. Since that time I've delved into, pretty exclusively, classic films and having discovered so many silent era titles that moved me so much, I'm a changed man forever.'

JOHANNA CUSTER: 'I have this thing for About Schmidt and pretty much every movie that has a male everyman character who is just this total slob of a man, lost and unable to connect with anything around him. when I'm bummed and I feel like looking for something that's on my emotional level at the moment I pop in a movie like that. Bill Murray movies tend to be good for that too, as do Wes Anderson flicks. When I was younger and channeled my emotions more physically, I think I would have responded with something sillier, like Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Life of Brian or Army of Darkness.'

NEIL SARVER: 'I see Hollywood like as an abusive spouse. I'm hopelessly in love with it. I know what it's capable of, and on it's best days, it makes me so deliriously happy that I want to forgive it on the days that it neglects and abuses me. The most basic crime it commits, and has since its very beginnings, is thinking that audiences as a whole fail to respond to anything beyond the surface. If Jaws is successful, perhaps it's not because they are hungering for movies about killer sharks, but for the well-realized characters and greatly crafted thrills in a general way. If the Lord of the Rings movies are successful, maybe there's something more to their success than wizards and dragons.'

PETER NELLHAUS: 'I have had several. The best were at Telluride. Of those, my favorite moments were a brief meeting with Julie Christie in 1974, and interviewing Henry King by a creek, an appropriately pastoral setting ... I had a nice chat with Jonathan Demme about mutual acquintances that I knew from NYU. Part of my neighborhood in Miami Beach was used for second unit filming of Transporter 2. My wife looked longingly at Jason Statham's stunt double ... There was also the time I worked at the Greenwich Theater in NYC, and saw how James Coco kept his weight up.'

EVAN WATERS: 'Historical epics often lose me -- they get a weird buttoned-down solemnity at their worst, which has a distancing effect. Even though major historical details may be changed, you still feel like the filmmakers felt they had a responsibility to Take Things Seriously. The best films of this genre are either so brilliantly executed that the solemnity is appropriate (Das Boot, Schindler's List, etc.) or cast off that feeling completely and work as entertainment (The Aviator, 300). I also tend to be disengaged by that kind of horror movie where you know there's no point getting involved with any character except the designated survivor because everyone else is just there to pad the body count.'

PEET GELDERBLOM: 'I’m a sucker for lyrical tragedy. As far as that’s concerned, nothing beats the ending of Brian De Palma’s Blow Out. It’s a movie so ripe with drama and metaphor that it becomes part of your metabolism. When Jack kneels down to hold Sally’s lifeless body in his arms and the fireworks go off in the background, he’s really holding America’s lost innocence. A profound moment; tragic, beautiful and blackly humorous at the same time.'

TUCKER TEAGUE: 'Sometimes I wonder if watching movies is something I dreamed I used to do. Life has been so crazybusy the past couple+ years that the frequency of my film viewing has been erratic and sporadic at best. If I am lucky I see a couple a week, if not I see one every two weeks (which appalls me, frankly). I used to watch many a films a week, often one a day in college, and several each weekend. But there is a bright spot; I have been introducing the cinematic art to my daughter (7 years old!) and that has given me the chance to see a few more films. Part of the reason has to do with the fact that many of the films I like she shouldn't watch until she’s older. I would like to stay up and watch them, but alas, I go to bed early so I can get up early to do homework before real work. So it makes sense to pick films she can watch too. Lately we have seen several Hitchcock films, among others.'

JEFF IGNATIUS: 'I can't think of any particular prompt, but at some point in the mid-1990s, for a period I wrote an essay about every movie I saw, and the one that sticks in my faulty memory is Atom Egoyan's Calendar. Steve Buscemi's Trees Lounge and Hitchcock's Vertigo were also important movies for me at that time, and what I wrote about them helped me better understand how movies work and my relationship with them. Writing about film turned me from a passive viewer to an active participant.'

ROSS RUEDIGER: 'What the hell has happened to independent film? When was the last time a true indie made some waves? Open Water? There was supposed to be this huge revolution with the technology that’s now available, but it doesn’t seem that anybody’s using it properly or we’d be seeing more breakout hits. Simply put: Digital cameras do not write great scripts. At least Hollywood still has the ability to get behind a handful of great scripts every year and they may even be one of the last hopes for decent, English-speaking film.'

ANDRE GOWER: 'Doing a guest spot on The A-Team was great. I mean, how many kids have ever chopped down a tree with Mr. T?! I might be the only one. They were great to work with, very fun, yet professional set.'

EMMA: 'At the best of times, I’m just an angry teen, ready to drill holes in the wall, and watching comedy films really do cheer me up and stop me from behaving this way. Ones that I can watch over and over again are Finding Nemo, Legally Blonde, Harvey, Some Like It Hot, and Sabrina.'

CINEBEATS: '1991 was really special because I met my future husband that year at a screening of the director’s cut of Blade Runner and I can’t forget that. Who knew that Ridley Scott’s neo-noir science fiction thriller could bring two people together?'

JOE VALDEZ: 'I paid money to see Species II in a theater. Is that embarrassing?'

FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Joe Valdez

Joe Valdez has a good thing going at This Distracted Globe. If the spiffy digs don't catch your eye, pay attention to his current examinations of remakes, which looks at the classic and modern versions of such films as The Fog, The Thing, The Truth About Charlie and Rollerball. Joe has a refined, consistent reviewing style, approaching each subject objectively and giving you insight into the production, as well as his opinions and those of other critics. Joe also keeps handy, updated lists of the best and worst movies in addition to a fun gallery of sweet one-sheets old and new. I'm raising a preemptive glass to Joe for his upcoming Paul Verhoeven retrospective, Black Book can't get here soon enough.

'THAT WAS ...... GOOD': 'I've been to a couple of test screenings and gone up to the director afterwards to tell him what I thought of the movie. I met John Lee Hancock when The Alamo was being tested, and Gregory Nava back when he was testing Why Do Fools Fall In Love. They were both too friendly for me to say, "Yeah, so, that sucked." I try to find something positive to say.'

BROTHER FROM ANOTHER PLANET: 'My brother can't wait for Nicolas Cage to make another movie. He loves bad movies. If I enjoy a film that's supposedly bad - like Showgirls - it's not because I'm sitting there loving how awful it is, but because in my warped mind, I think there's actually cool stuff in it.'

FISTFUL O' DVDS: 'They must have audio commentary. Greatest of all time is probably Paul Thomas Anderson talking about Boogie Nights. John Carpenter & Kurt Russell are far less informative but just as entertaining on the ones they do.'

NOW PLAYING: 'I rarely watch two completely unrelated movies. This week will be a double feature, Searching For Debra Winger and Double Dare, documentaries about women in the film industry. In a couple of weeks, I'm doing the best movies shot in Texas, including The Getaway, The Last Picture Show, Urban Cowboy, Fandango , and Bottle Rocket. When Black Book comes out on DVD, I'll do a Paul Verhoeven retrospective, starting with Turkish Delight.'

SNAIL MAIL: '2-3 movies a week, courtesy of either Netflix or Greencine. I rarely go to a theater anymore. It has to be a movie I can't wait to come in the mail, like The Dark Knight, or the next film from Michael Mann.'

MONEY TO BURN: 'I paid money to see Species II in a theater. Is that embarrassing?'

TALK LIKE A JOE VALDEZ TODAY!: 'A tie between "Gosh!" from Napoleon Dynamite, and "Sometimes there's just not enough rocks" from Forrest Gump.'

CEMENT SHOES: 'I never leave my seat until the show is over. I've only walked out on a movie once. Dumb and Dumber.'

TRIP DOWN MURDERER'S ROW: '1984. Splash, Romancing The Stone, This Is Spinal Tap, Sixteen Candles, Once Upon A Time In America, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Gremlins, Ghostbusters, The Karate Kid, Red Dawn, Purple Rain, Buckaroo Banzai, Amadeus, The Terminator, A Nightmare On Elm Street, Beverly Hills Cop all came out the same year. For an 11 year old, it doesn't get any better than that.'

SCARE-IT: 'Alien. The ventilator shaft sequence. You know, where Tom Skeritt crawls through the duct work of the Nostromo, and Veronica Cartwright starts to spaz out when the motion tracker shows something moving closer to him. I saw that in a theater for Halloween recently and people in the audience still screamed.'

Contact DVD Panache if you are interested in being featured on Friday Screen Test.

FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Cinebeats

Possessing a love for cinema of the 60s and 70s -- like most of us, except more so -- Cinebeats (aka Kimberly) has spread her affection far and wide across the Information Super Blog-o-Cloverleaf Freeway. It all starts at the Cinebeats blog, where Kimberly digs into fresh discussions such as a look at actor James Fox's underrated career or a confession of her love for Superchick. After that, head on over to the jive happenins at The Groovy Age of Horror or Cinedelica or The Horror Blog Roundtable -- she contributes to all of them. There may be a few more Cinebeats landing pads out there I missed, but there's more than enough aforementioned to go around. Kimberly has some great taste in films (Equinox! Yes!) and actors (Marisa Mell! Yes!), so chances are she'll regularly turn you on to some great movies.

CINEBUMPS: 'I had a long distance relationship with a independent director from New York for a brief time, but I’m not willing to kiss and tell about that odd relationship just yet. I will mention that since I live in the Bay Area near Lucas Valley I have come in contact with director George Lucas numerous times, but it wasn’t always in the most comfortable circumstances. I can be a little clumsy and oddly enough I’ve literally bumped into the guy often which became rather awkward. The last time it happened he gave me an odd look like, “It’s you! That weird girl who keeps bumping into me because she’s not looking where she’s walking.” I apologized of course, but I’m still waiting for Lucas to apologize for the last four Star Wars films. As far as directors go, I’ve also met Clive Barker on a few occasions and he’s one of the nicest filmmakers and writers that I’ve ever met. He’s really friendly and open, and he enjoys talking about his work a lot. It’s a shame that he hasn’t made more movies.'

GIMME GIALLO, ANY GIALLO: 'I tend to buy a lot of horror films, cult movies, international films and unusual titles that were previously really hard to find and sadly often go out of print rather quickly. I make a point of buying every giallo and krimi film that I can find since those are two film genres that really interest me. In turn I try and support smaller DVD companies like Mondo Macabro, Blue Underground, No Shame and Panik House whenever I can since I tend to really like the films they release. I also love companies like Criterion and Kino so I try and support them whenever I can afford to since I generally like a lot of their releases as well.'

CINEMA DE CINEBEATS: 'My revival theater would undoubtedly showcase sixties and seventies era cinema since that's where my own interests are really are focused. I would love to run a week long program of International horror movies and thrillers made between 1960-1980 if I could find good prints of them. I would kick off the event with a weekend of British films like Peeping Tom, Don’t Look Now, The Collector and the original Wicker Man followed by some great gothic horror films made by studios like Hammer, Amicus and Trigon. I’d devote Monday to French and Polish horror since there is some crossover there and show movies such as Eyes Without a Face, Blood and Roses, The Beast and some of Roman Polanski and Jean Rollins’ films. Tuesday would be the beginning of a three day tribute to Italian cinema. There’s nothing quite like Italian horror films so I think devoting three days to them within the week long event would be well worth it. The first day I would show gothic Italian horror films which often starred the lovely Barbara Steele such as Black Sunday, Castle of Blood, The Horrible Dr. Hitchcock and Nightmare Castle. I’d devote Wednesday to showing my favorite giallo films and Thursday would be devoted to Italian zombie movies. On Friday I’d play the best German krimi thrillers I could find featuring my favorite German actor, Klaus Kinski. Spanish and Latin American horror would be showcased on Saturday and some of the director’s featured would include Jess Franco, Coffin Joe, Juan Lopez Moctezuma and Jorge Grau. On Sunday I’d wrap things up with an entire day devoted to Japanese films such as Kwaidan, Blind Beast and The Face of Another, along with as many films by directors Nobuo Nakagawa and Michio Yamamoto that I could get my hands on. Naturally I’d invite guests to talk and mingle with the audience as well and since it is my theater, I’d also try and get a liquor license so I could serve booze there. I’ve never understood why American theaters are alcohol free zones. Movie theaters in places like Japan and the U.K. often serve alcohol.'

ORIGIN STORY: 'I’ve always loved writing and I’ve always loved film so I suppose the two things just sort of went hand in hand. When I was in high-school I started writing for the school newspaper and ended up as a co-editor. I wrote a couple of reviews for horror movies back then and got them published in the paper. At the time I had dreams of writing for Fangoria magazine some day. I still love writing about horror films, but my interests have expanded a lot. I do think it’s a shame that more women aren’t writing about genre films so I often focus on them in my own blog now. That’s one of the main reasons I was inspired to start Cinebeats.'

HOUSE OF THE DVDS: 'I usually watch at least two or three films a week at home. Sometimes more and sometimes less. I rarely go out to see movies unless it’s to see a revival of some older film and that doesn’t happen too often anymore due to the high cost of ticket prices I’m afraid. In all honesty 75% of the new films being released lately don’t interest me much. Thankfully there are hundreds of older films being made available every month on DVD to keep me happy.'

THANKS, DAD: 'My dad is really responsible for getting me interested in horror movies when I was just a kid. He loved the old Universal monster movies and Hammer films, and he managed to pass that passion onto me. We used to spend every weekend together watching something called the “Monster Matinee” on television or going to the local drive-in. He was fascinated with actors like Boris Karloff, Vincent Price and Christopher Lee as well as special effects and makeup used in the movies. On the other hand my mom hated horror films. She saw Hitchcock’s Psycho when she was a teenager and it scared her to death so she vowed never to watch another thriller or horror film again. Thankfully she didn’t try and stop me from watching them, but she often expressed her displeasure to my dad when he would let me watch horror films with him. I think my dad was just happy that he finally had someone to watch horror movies with after I was born so he let me watch a lot of films that other kids my age probably weren’t allowed to.'

SPEAK THE CINEBEATS: 'Not a lot, but I’ve been known to say silly things on occasion like “Game Over!” from Aliens or “You sure have a nose for shit!” from Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia. I will mention that on any given day you can find me humming songs from my favorite musicals or singing my favorite movie theme songs out loud. I’ve annoyed people with my poor renditions of songs from West Side Story, Funny Girl and Cabaret on more than one occasion.'

WANNA SEE SOMETHING REALLY SCARY?: 'A lot of people assume that since I grew up watching horror films and have seen so many of them that they don’t scare me anymore, but nothing could be further from the truth. Psychological horror is especially disturbing to me when it’s done well. Some of the scariest movies ever made don’t necessarily contain “jump out of your seat” moments. Jack Clayton’s The Innocents, Roman Polanski’s The Tenant, Nicloas Roeg’s Don’t Look Now and Andrezej Zulawski’s Possession are examples of what I would consider great psychological horror films that are truly frightening. I’ve seen those movies numerous times, but I still find them really disturbing. Particular scenes that have really sacred me are often rather low-key moments in films that sort of creep over the viewer such as when Deborah Kerr spots the shape of a woman standing across the lake in The Innocents or when Roman Polanski discovers a tooth in the wall in The Tenant. Those are both really frightening moments to me.'

NEW HALLOWEEN, YAY OR NAY?: 'I’ve got to say nay. I’ve been really disappointed with the lack of original ideas coming out of Hollywood, including all the horror remakes in recent years. I’m also not a fan of Rob Zombie’s films so I can’t say that I’m really looking forward to his remake of John Carpenter’s Halloween. I have nothing against remakes if the director brings something new to the table and they’re done well such as David Cronenberg’s brilliant version of The Fly, but I just don’t think that’s going to happen with Halloween. Oddly enough one of my favorite remakes is John Carpenter’s version of The Thing which I happen to think is superior to the first film. Carpenter went back to the source material and his remake is actually more true to John W. Campbell’s original story in my opinion and it’s just a really terrific film on its own. Hopefully Rob Zombie will take some cues from Carpenter’s remake of The Thing and bring that kind of imagination and creativity to his version of Halloween, but I think that’s doubtful. Halloween is a film franchise that’s been beaten into the grave at this point and it would take a miracle to breath life into it again.'
THIS IS FOR PRIS!: '1991 was really special because I met my future husband that year at a screening of the director’s cut of Blade Runner and I can’t forget that. Who knew that Ridley Scott’s neo-noir science fiction thriller could bring two people together?'

Contact DVD Panache if you are interested in being featured in Friday Screen Test.

FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Emma

The youngest member of the Friday Screen Test Fraternity, Emma has knowledge and taste in film far beyond her 17 years. As the proprietor of All About My Movies and the host of The Performance That Changed Your Life Blog-a-Thon, she will shatter any preconceived notions you may have about British school girls. In the process of counting down her 100 Favorite Movies, Emma has found time to fill us in on The Eargasm of Thomas Newman and the 10 actors she loathes. If you're one of those types who needs an avatar to show how cool you are, Emma specializes in creating them, just take a look at her sidebar.

THAT'ULL BE THA DAY: 'It was the 7th of January, 2006, and I’d just had my heart broken watching Brokeback Mountain. I realised there and then that I had to spread the word about how much I loved it, et voila, a few days later, I had me my very own film blog!'

JUDGE. BOOK. COVER: 'If I haven’t seen the movie, then I must have heard something good about it from someone who’s opinion I trust. That said, there’s been many an occasion where I’ve just seen the DVD cover for a movie, thought, “Hmm, that looks interesting”, and paid for the film, without having had researched it much. As for movies that I’ve seen, then it either has to be something I rate 8/10 or more, or have some incredible DVD extras in which there are interviews with hot actors. I’m deep, I am.'

THIS WEEK AT CINEMA EMMA: 'A marathon of films with my “Holy trinity” of filmmakers, and the three in that Trinity are the incredibly talented and versatile Alfred Hitchcock, the beautiful and classy Audrey Hepburn, and the best actor, and most alluring man ever to have walked the planet, Marlon Brando. The films I’d show of theirs would be a combination of my personal favourites from theirs – Rear Window, Roman Holiday, On the Waterfront, as well as those that contain their best work – Vertigo, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, and A Streetcar Named Desire. It shall be exquisite.'

GLORY DAYS: 'I used to watch movies ALL the time. Like, one or two a day. I literally couldn’t function without them, they were as vital to me as oxygen, as water, as earrings. But in the past year, schoolwork has really gotten on top of me and I’ve had to give priority to revising for my ASs and writing essays, as I’m in the year where our grades are a huge decider in which Universities we get into. So now I usually see about 2 per week. I hate that I’m sacrificing my one true love in order to study (and a lot of the time, studying things I don’t enjoy), but here’s to hoping that all my hard work pays off, and in the future, my nice job will mean I can watch as many movies as I so desire!'

I ... DON'T GET IT: 'David Lynch, and whatever genre he’s supposed to represent. I enjoyed The Elephant Man and The Straight Story, but I really do think his other films are a severe case of “the emperor has no clothes.” What a pretentious hack!'

SO SHE TURNED HERSELF TO FACE HER ...: 'At the best of times, I’m just an angry teen, ready to drill holes in the wall, and watching comedy films really do cheer me up and stop me from behaving this way. Ones that I can watch over and over again are Finding Nemo, Legally Blonde, Harvey, Some Like It Hot, and Sabrina.'

TALK LIKE AN EMMA TODAY!: '“I wish I knew how to quit you” from Brokeback Mountain has been repeated so much by me, and often I just say it when I can’t think of anything to say. Also, from Brokeback, “goddamn bitch of an unsatisfactory situation” is said quite a lot from me. Also, I’ve taken to saying “Mrs. Robinson, you’re trying to seduce me” in a Dustin Hoffman-esque voice to my friends, but no-one really gets the joke. Blah.'

THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT: 'Antoine Doinel in Les quatre cent coups [The 400 Blows]. Like Antoine, I’m a kid who’s not bad, my intentions are good, I’m just severely misunderstood! On many an occasion I’ve felt like the round peg for the square hole, though, unlike Antoine, I’ve never had quite the pluck to just roam around the streets and bunk off school. I also connect with Lost in Translation’s Charlotte (though it is not a film I like at all). Like Charlotte, I often feel neglected and can’t find my place in life. Also, I'd like to think that there was something of me in Andy from The Shawshank Redemption, which just so happens to be my favourite film. Like in Andy, I'm quick with numbers, I'm pragmatic and I'm trapped in a "prison" of sorts (Sixth form), and I hope that one day, I shall see redemption like him.'

MARVELOUS VILLAINY: 'Probably Ralph Fiennes as Lord Voldemort in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire… because I’m a total Harry Potter fangirl! I read the books when they first came out and I’ve been obsessed with the franchise ever since. The image of Fiennes as Voldemort still haunts me, he’s amazing in that role. Can’t wait for the fifth film.'

OH WHAT A YEAR: '2003 – I watched over 400 films in this year, and realised that films were my life. I’ve been under the spell of cinema ever since.'

Contact DVD Panache if you are interested in being featured in Friday Screen Test.

Meet ANDRE GOWER, the Monster Squad-a-Thon Grand Marshal!

[Yes, The Monster Squad-a-Thon is upon us! Here's how it's gonna go down today through Thursday: as you look to your right you will see my sidebar which has been updated to be a master list for all the content I'm gonna throw at you. Keep checking back for updates on the list of contributions, and there's going to be a few more updates by yours truly during the next couple days -- including a review of the Monster Squad DVD tomorrow! Again, if you are interested in contributing please email me or leave a comment and I'll add your link to the page (you can also email me a contribution if you are blog-less.]

I promised you lovely readers a VERY SPECIAL GUEST for The Monster Squad-a-Thon, and well -- I think I delivered: meet Andre Gower, the leader of the Monster Squad, and the flag bearer for this momentous day. Before starring in The Monster Squad as Sean Crenshaw, Andre had a prolific television career with roles in shows such as The A-Team, Mr. Belvedere, Night Court, Knight Rider and T.J. Hooker. After an extended break from acting, Andre is back in Hollywood, and you can keep up with his career via his MySpace blog, where he also gives you some honest advice for any aspiring actors. As you read this Andre is in Los Angeles for a variety of Monster Squad screenings, and has been making his way to Monster Squad Reunion screenings across the country during 2007. Please give thanks to Andre, as he was nice enough to let me have a few minutes of his time:

DVD Panache: What did your monster movie education consist of before being cast in Monster Squad?
Andre Gower: Your basic film going foundation really. Who hasn't seen the classic Dracula and Frankenstein and Mummy movies that had been done til then. I always had a admiration for The Creature From the Black Lagoon, just because I thought he was a cool looking monster. The original concept had a lot of background history and clues to movies and monsters that really was a homage to the great depictions in literature and on film of the past. Then Monster Squad comes along and puts them all together…how cool is that.

D: The idea of Monster Squad must have sounded a little ridiculous on paper, what were some of your initial thoughts on the project?
A: The original script was longer and much more detailed with historical cues and monster lore as well as more interaction with the squad and the monsters. The shooting script (the one we see today) is extremely scaled down and cut up so it may appear to be campy and quick. But Fred and Shane originally had a rather deep concept on paper based on Fred's idea of what if the The Little Rascals fought the classic Universal movie monsters. My initial response to the film was "hell yeah!" I mean, look at it. We get to ride around town, cuss, break stuff, get chased and kill monsters…who wouldn't like that! But again, the original draft was much more involved and had a lot of cool stuff that made the kids, and the monsters, deeper characters.

D: Horror movies have gotten progressively more popular over the past decade, how would you compare today's horror environment with that of the late 80s?
A: The 80s, 90s and today… are so different in terms of what the popular taste is. The resurgence of the low-budget slasher/thriller movie from the 70's has made a "screaming" comeback. I think a lot of the movies in the 80's were more adventure based and took people on a journey. Today, the movies just take you someplace you want to get the hell out of! Some are great, others are easy remakes that fall short. But the formula works. I think that's why MS was so different, it had kids that had intelligence as well as imagination. It had adventure along side of being in rather precarious situations. That's why the fan base is SO spread out between girls an boys of different ages. Everybody has a character they can relate to or wanted to be like.

D: You had a part on The A-Team, what was that set atmosphere like for a young boy?
A: Doing a guest spot on The A-Team was great. I mean, how many kids have ever chopped down a tree with Mr. T?! I might be the only one. They were great to work with, very fun, yet professional set.

D: Even though it's taken this long for Monster Squad to arrive on DVD, it has still remained very popular -- why has it had such great staying power?
A: I think it has to do with the total originality of the concept. Bringing together the classic movie monsters and the classic dynamic of a group of kids put a different spin on the good vs. evil thing. There isn't one part of the story that people aren't attached to in some way. Like I mentioned before, everybody has a character they can relate to or had always wished they could be…the cool kid, the little sister, the best friend, the leader and yes…even the fat kid. And what solidifies that feeling with the movie, is that each and every one of us is the hero of the film. We each play a part in the build-up and the final battle that, if we failed, we wouldn't have won. An absolute kid fantasy.

D: What was the scariest part of the Monster Squad shoot for you?
A: There wasn't too much that was actually "frightening" per se for me. Yes, there is some huge monsters running around breaking stuff, but it was also a movie set. A big budget, complex production with a huge crew and lots of effects. It's a lot of work for anybody, especially young kids to be on a big set and have to perform. I think, looking back, we did a pretty good job. Fred had a lot to do with that the way he approached and handled his complex duties as director/writer and dealing with a group of kids on top of that. He made a concerted effort to treat each of us fairly and professionally yet also as friends and created a real connection with each of us as individuals.
"Yes, there is some huge monsters running around breaking stuff, but it was also a movie set. A big budget, complex production with a huge crew and lots of effects. It's a lot of work for anybody, especially young kids to be on a big set and have to perform. I think, looking back, we did a pretty good job. Fred had a lot to do with that the way he approached and handled his complex duties as director/writer and dealing with a group of kids on top of that. He made a concerted effort to treat each of us fairly and professionally yet also as friends and created a real connection with each of us as individuals.

D: You've appeared at a number of Monster Squad reunion screenings, what can you say about those?
A: I can't say enough really. They have been the coolest events I have been to. It's been great getting together with Ryan, Ashley and Fred and we even got to see Ducan Regher and Tom Noonan recently at a convention. Now with the DVD release, I hope we have a lot more great events to attend. The fans make these things though. They simply love this film, they love the story and they love the characters. The original fans are all grown up, but have handed their love for it down to younger generations...and it works there too. They are honest fans who hold this film close to them. I am constantly told and sent mail explaining how MS was the all-time best thing in someone's childhood. You can't beat being a part of that. That stuff lasts forever.

D: What acting projects are in the future for Andre Gower?
A: Hopefully many! I have been gearing towards getting back in to the business full-time this last year or so balancing my current projects and business that I am involved in. But I am always looking for great opportunities and love meeting filmmakers from all over, especially new ones as well as established names. So, if anybody would like to get a hold of me, please do so!

D: What was Fred Dekker's direction like on the famous "wolf man's got nards" scene?
A: You know, it was a hectic scene that originally had a lot more going on before they started editing the shooting script. It was a great set, in a spooky mansion that all of a sudden cut loose with explosions, monsters and humor. You would think a line like that might not work in that circumstance…but on the contrary, it became THE catch-phrase from the film. Fred just set things up as he usually did and pointed us in the direction he needed us to end up. We just allowed the energy of the scene to come through and it worked. The whole movie is like that. Fred never hovered over us with a hammer dictating how to read lines or what expressions to use etc. He allowed us to be us…a group of kids. That's one reason the film plays so well with people. It's not corny, campy acting. It's real kids dealing with an unreal situation. That's how Fred designed it and how it worked out.

Had you read any Stephen King before your Monster Squad role? (Andre's character wears a "Stephen King Rules" t-shirt for most of the movie -Ed.)
I actually screen tested for Cujo a few years earlier and started reading that for background. But other than that, not much back then. His stuff is as creative and imaginative as it gets. Great reads now.

FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Ross Ruediger

Even if you don't agree with what Ross Ruediger has to say at The Rued Morgue, he gets the last laugh because he lives in San Antonio and you probably don't. He probably wrote his answers from the basement of the Alamo just to prove it exists, Pee Wee be damned. Ross is more than just the product of parents with exceptional taste in names, his writing can be found at the wondrous The House Next Door, where he reviews Dr. Who episodes, and at the eclectic Liverputty, where his Rued Manifesto gets a bit of everything off his chest. When he's not talking about himself, Ross has found time for sprawling looks at James Bond to commemorate the year of our spy 2007. And his writings are certainly not limited to the digital variety, as Ross is even an occasional playwright (scroll down to the second story).

NOW SHOWING AT THE RUED MORGUE CINEMA: 'I’d love to do a marathon called “Chick Flicks for Guys” – a series of movies guys might at first glance think “No way in hell”: Tootsie, Love Actually, How to Make an American Quilt, P.S., In Her Shoes, All About Eve, Women in Love, Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore, Hannah and Her Sisters, One True Thing, Grace of My Heart, Shampoo, Truly, Madly, Deeply. Those would be a good start. Or a Ma and Pa Kettle marathon – just to see who’d stay ‘til the end.

JUST ONE QUESTION: 'Christopher Eccleston: Why did you leave “Doctor Who” after only one season? David Tennant’s done an exceptional job of picking up where Eccleston left off, but I’ll always wonder what heights he may have reached with the role had he gone on and done another season or two.'

I ... DON'T GET IT: 'Aside from a couple of exceptions, I don’t get Spike Lee or Michael Mann. I don’t care for Mel Gibson as a filmmaker. In general, I don’t really understand action movies, but maybe that’s got more to do with most of them sucking these days. I remain mystified by the popularity of Will Ferrell.'

SCENES FROM THE RUED MORGUE: 'Since I’ve lived with a TV critic (Jeanne Jakle of the S.A. Express-News) for the past 6 years and watch a fair amount of TV with her, my movie watching habits aren’t quite as intense as they used to be, but hopefully at least 3 DVDs a week and maybe 5 or so more on DirectTV. I’m also the kind of person who enjoys pulling out stacks of movies just to sift through favorite scenes. Whenever people are over at our place that can be great fun for the uninitiated. The other night we had a friend over who’d never seen Jon Voight back when he was young, so I put on the first 5 minutes of Midnight Cowboy and she was blown away.'

ROSS ON THE RUN: 'The Rued Morgue is less of a movie blog than it is something “else”. The goal is to present either entertaining or informative pieces (or ideally both), and from the beginning I didn’t want to box myself into just being a critic. I don’t even think I’m a particularly good critic and tend to shy away from writing about anything I don’t like. I take a lot longer to write my stuff than most and often a week goes by and I’ve done nothing substantial. One thing I do is occasionally throw out something personal – some anecdote or whatever - and attempt to craft it in a way to which hopefully people relate. Generally those pieces get nice responses in the comments sections. I’m as big a nerd as anyone doing this stuff, but it’s even more fun to be a human nerd and remind people they’re not just reading the ramblings of an automaton. Maybe that’s indulgent – and I’m always nervous about presenting those pieces - but there’s value in at the very least making criticism personal as long as it doesn’t overshadow what needs to be said. The thing is there are so many other bloggers out there who are so much more insightful with their criticism, so I gotta find ways to play to my strengths. Maybe that’s the key to great blogging: Figure out what you’re good at and run with it.

'So all that said, to answer your question, Jeanne’s influence can’t be discounted, but I started The Rued Morgue specifically because of admiration for Matt Zoller Seitz’s The House Next Door. Matt busted my blog cherry; before The House I really didn’t know much about or even pay attention to blogs. I used to spend a lot of time reading Ain’t It Cool News, but was always frustrated by how shoddily put together it was -- all the bad grammar and typos and so forth. So in a way I gotta give Harry Knowles some credit because AICN led me to think, “I love this same stuff and I can create proper sentences”. And Roger Ebert. I’ve been reading Ebert for years and think he’s the greatest film critic from a writing standpoint, even though I often don’t agree with him.'

DO YOU PLAN ON BUYING THAT DVD, SIR?: 'It’s pretty simple: Do I foresee myself watching this more than once within the next year. Oh, and it’s gotta be something I’ve already seen and know is worth owning. I’ve burned myself too many times buying stuff sight unseen.'

UNORIGINAL DRUNK: '“There’s nothing more boring than people who love you” from Talk Radio. I met Eric Bogosian once and actually had him sign an autograph with that at the top. I quote so much stuff from so many movies so much of the time, that I’m sure I don’t have an original thought in my head – and anyone who spends time with me will confirm that. Lately I’ve been getting a lot of mileage out of, “Hey, careful man! There’s a beverage here!"'

I CAN HAS SCRIPT?: 'What the hell has happened to independent film? When was the last time a true indie made some waves? Open Water? There was supposed to be this huge revolution with the technology that’s now available, but it doesn’t seem that anybody’s using it properly or we’d be seeing more breakout hits. Simply put: Digital cameras do not write great scripts. At least Hollywood still has the ability to get behind a handful of great scripts every year and they may even be one of the last hopes for decent, English-speaking film.'

A PRETTY DECENT YEAR: 'At the time, ’94 seemed awfully good, but looking back it probably had more to do with where I was a person more than anything else.'
MY BLOG FOR A MILLION DOLLARS!: 'I’ve got no real problem with Hollywood most of the time. It’s a business, right? If Hollywood keeps making shitty movies, it’s only because people keep going to see them or renting or buying them. The industry can’t be held totally accountable for the public’s lack of taste or class. I’ll tell you what I do loathe, however: Straight-to-video garbage. There’s this entire sub-industry that’s somehow been around for years and years dedicated solely to making a few dollars profit. They don’t seem at all interested in making anything resembling an ambitious film (the major studios at least give the impression they’re trying). And these movies probably cost a mill or two apiece. What I wouldn’t give to have a million dollars to make a little indie film, but nobody would ever give me that money because my pitch wouldn’t look right on the video shelf. If they can’t envision the photoshopped DVD cover, they won’t make it. And who are “they” by the way? Somebody’s turning a nice quick buck by essentially turning out reams of nothing even remotely substantial every year.'

Contact DVD Panache if you are interested in being featured on Friday Screen Test.

FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Jeff Ignatius

Proprietor of the most elegant site in the Friday Screen Test cohort (edging out Burbanked), Jeff Ignatius' Culture Snob has been on the blog circuit seemingly since the Internet was just a twinkle in Al Gore's eye. Debuting in 2003 as part of the patriarch journal site Diaryland, Culture Snob has enough fun material in the archives to keep you occupied well into the last third of a 24-hour Bill Pullman marathon on TNT. Jeff is not only gracious enough to give us his Top 100 Albums, but he has also crafted a Box Office Power Rankings criteria that almost makes too much sense. I found Culture Snob through its marvelous Misunderstood Blog-a-thon in May that ended up being far from misunderstood -- it just plain rocked.

I WANT IT!: 'This Is Spinal Tap's Stonehenge, so that I might protect it from being trod upon by a dwarf.'

SO THERE'S THAT: 'In 1991, my girlfriend at the time nannied for Gary Sinise and Moira Harris, and I spent a week (or two?) helping out in the Chicago apartment where she was living. She was in Curse of the Starving Class at Steppenwolf. I never met him. But I can say I cared for two of Gary Sinise's kids.'

NOW PLAYING AT CULTURE SNOB CINEMA: 'Although movies are too collaborative for me to subscribe to the auteur concept, I love to see filmmakers whose body of work reveals themes that might not be apparent from the separate movies. Peter Weir is fascinated by diaspora and isolation. Christopher Nolan appears healthily obsessed with destructive obsessions. Egoyan loves to explore perspective and the mutability of truth. So I would probably program marathons by filmmaker to highlight themes. Compare Memento to Batman Begins, for example, or Picnic at Hanging Rock and Fearless and The Truman Show.'

DAYS OF ESSAYS PASSED: 'I can't think of any particular prompt, but at some point in the mid-1990s, for a period I wrote an essay about every movie I saw, and the one that sticks in my faulty memory is Atom Egoyan's Calendar. Steve Buscemi's Trees Lounge and Hitchcock's Vertigo were also important movies for me at that time, and what I wrote about them helped me better understand how movies work and my relationship with them. Writing about film turned me from a passive viewer to an active participant.'

WE'RE GOING TO THE PICTURES!: 'We typically watch two to three movies a week at home. I'm also watching something during my twice- or thrice-weekly workouts. (Presently I'm re-watching the first season of The Wire.) We've gone "out" to the movies three times so far in 2007: Pan's Labyrinth, 28 Weeks Later, and -- at the drive-in -- Spider-Man 3. Because of a flat tire, we caught far more of Ghost Rider than we wanted.'

BOUND TO THE BOOK: 'I don't see the point of period chamber dramas of the Merchant Ivory variety. They seem better suited to novels than cinema, and -- more to the point -- they seem a particularly bad match for what movies do well.'
PREPARE FOR LANDING: 'The final depiction of the plane crash in Fearless. The beautifully re-created violence is balanced by the patience and ache of Gorecki's third symphony, and the choices related to non-music sound and dialogue are surprising and meaningful without drawing undue attention to themselves.'

TALK LIKE A CULTURE SNOB TODAY: 'Lesser-known lines from This Is Spinal Tap, such as "I envy us." "Inconceivable" and related dialogue from The Princess Bride.'

DON'T JUDGE ME: 'My movie education is woeful, in part because I wasn't a film major -- I've never even taken a film course -- and in part because movies have always been an avocation rather than a vocation. From the BFI's most recent polls, I've never seen (although I own it), 8 1/2Battleship Potemkin, Bicycle Thieves, Rashomon (recorded on the DVR at home), La Règle du Jeu, Seven Samurai, Singin' in the Rain, Sunrise, or Tokyo Story.'

THE YEAR THAT WAS: '1999 seems like a particularly good year: American Beauty, Being John Malkovich, eXistenZ, Fight Club, The Insider, The Iron Giant, Magnolia, Three Kings, Toy Story 2. Those are nine relatively wide-release movies that I'd be happy to watch at any time. That was also the year I met the woman who would become my wife, so it's special for that reason, too.'

Contact DVD Panache if you are interested in being featured on Friday Screen Test.

FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Tucker Teague

You may be inclined to wonder why certain blogs exist, but not at PilgrimAkimbo -- because Tucker Teague has already answered that question for you. That wonderfully written and honest post is a good gateway into PilgrimAkimbo because it gives you an indication of what Tucker, and his writing, is all about -- and just why it's there on your computer screen. But even if Tucker hadn't given us that post it would be abundantly clear why PilgrimAkimbo is out there: the man can write, and he has no shortage of film interests and opinions. Tucker's tastes are truly wordly, as evidenced by his love for African films, notably those of Ousmane Sembene. Tucker made a few New Year's Blogger Resolutions, and we can only hope those are going well, especially if it means more posts about educating his young daughter about film.

A FEW QUESTIONS, SIRS: 'Tarantino. As in, “Hey Mr. Cool, why is it that you spend so much energy, so much creative brain power, so much talent making films that, while entertaining and sometimes pushing boundaries, rarely have any value beyond their shiny surfaces?”

'F. Coppola: Why did you stop making great films? Did you get scared?

'Speilberg: Why did you put the red-coat girl in Schindler's List? I though it was too cheesy and distracting.

'Eisentsein: Why didn't you come to the US and make films? oh... there are so many "whys."'

OUTSIDE THE LINES: 'Sometimes I feel that the whole idea of genres is too limiting. Film Noir, for example, is a great genre, and having a way to name it helps, but where is the boundary? The same goes for comedy. On the other hand, I think I understand all genres – at least I can’t think of one I don’t. As for directors, there are many that I don’t care for, or would not make the films they make, but “getting” a director is generally rather easy – if only because the variety of human experience and psychological nuances is so varied and that being open to that fact is just a part of growing up, so getting a director is often just a matter of letting them be who they are and not struggling to fit them into a box. If there are any directors I don’t “get” I would have to say they come from cultures that are very different from mine. I love Japanese and African film, but I can’t say that I truly understand them at a deep level. The gulf between our cultures is too great. On the other hand, the most important aspects of being human are universal.'

TRUE: 'When, in Umberto D., Umberto sinks to begging and then can’t do it; or the helicopter attack sequence in Apocalypse Now; or the stair massacre sequence in Battleship Potemkin; or the “Gotta Dance” scene in Singing in the Rain; or the “Who are you?” moment in Lawrence of Arabia; etc. etc. If I didn’t have many of these kinds of instances, or more importantly, if I wasn’t’ the kind of person who could have these kinds of experiences, then I couldn't call myself a lover of film and I would have no reason to have a film blog.'

ARE YOU GOING TO BUY THAT DVD, SIR?: 'Will I want to watch it more than once? Will I want to share it with others? Will I want to study it closely?
NOW PLAYING AT PILGRIMAKIMBO CINEMA: 'Given that this is a fantasy kind of question, I will begin by being infinitely wealthy so that I can show any film I wish and all showings are free to the public. Second, many of the films would have an introduction provided before the viewing, possibly by a local film critic or teacher. Also, I would encourage mingling and discussion afterwords, possibly at the associate coffee house and/or pub next door. Also, as another aside, I have always wanted to have a theater where people could bring their sleeping bags and the films are projected on the ceiling. Anyway…

'Movie marathon: 24 hours of movies about Clowns. More seriously (slightly), I would like to have a LOTR BBQ - one rule: cannot show up in costume.

'Double bills: 400 Blows & Lonely are the Brave; Matewan & Harlan County USA;

'Themed week: (heavy) The Holocaust and film; (light) Greatest comedies of the 1970s; or a week centered around films shot by a particular cinematographer.'

STUNTMAN TUCKER: 'I have always loved films. I used to make them as a kid, and I even dreamed of being a stuntman. When I first realized that films could be more than merely fun entertainment for kids (Herbie, The Apple Dumpling Gang, et al) was when my dad took me to see Lawrence of Arabia sometime in the mid 1970s at a little revival theater. I was stunned. From that moment onward I began to seek out films that could offer me that kind of depth and power. Eventually, and years later, I found myself in the old Telecommunication and Film dept. at the University of Oregon (now defunct) studying film. There is where I began to write about film. More recently, I have begun again with my modest blog, not so seriously yet, but enough to keep my mind engaged.'

WANNA SEE A MOVIE?: 'Sometimes I wonder if watching movies is something I dreamed I used to do. Life has been so crazybusy the past couple+ years that the frequency of my film viewing has been erratic and sporadic at best. If I am lucky I see a couple a week, if not I see one every two weeks (which appalls me, frankly). I used to watch many a films a week, often one a day in college, and several each weekend. But there is a bright spot; I have been introducing the cinematic art to my daughter (7 years old!) and that has given me the chance to see a few more films. Part of the reason has to do with the fact that many of the films I like she shouldn't watch until she’s older. I would like to stay up and watch them, but alas, I go to bed early so I can get up early to do homework before real work. So it makes sense to pick films she can watch too. Lately we have seen several Hitchcock films, among others.'

DEFENDING YOUR ART: 'In general, when it comes to art, I defend no one. If a filmmaker, genre, school, or filmmaking union town cannot defend itself, then it deserves it’s fate. However, I do champion some, including some Hollywood directors and producers. I don’t really have an issue with Hollywood anymore than I do with all popular art and culture purveyors. What really makes the worst of Hollywood any different than the worst of any other culture creators? If people didn’t buy their products these company(s) would have gone out of business. So who’s to blame?'

DAYS OF PAST ... FUTURE?: 'The late 1980s/early 1990s were great for me. I had the freedom to see many, many films. I had access to many films – film department and working at a video store. I was teaching television production. I was studying independent filmmaking. And I had many great discussion about films with my friends and classmates. I am hoping to have another great era in the future. We'll see.'

Contact DVD Panache if you are interested in being featured on Friday Screen Test.

FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Peet Gelderblom

Peet Gelderblom directs, edits and develops commercials, TV programs and broadcast design ... in Amsterdam! This means that when he first saw Pulp Fiction and listened to John Travolta wax on about Dutch French fries and mayonnaise, Peet probably nodded his head appreciatively since he most likely had just indulged in that culinary tradition! But there's much more to Peet than commercials and mayonnaise, he keeps up the wonderful pop culture comic/blog Lost in Negative Space. Peet's illustrative sense is put to wonderful use here -- could he have nailed Inland Empire any better? To prove that he is adept with words as well as pictures, Peet is a contributor to the what-else-can-you-really-say-about-it? blog/zine The House Next Door, and his most recent post is a pique-your-interest early review about the forthcoming Danny Boyle epic Sunshine. If you still want more Peet, go to 24 Lies a Second where he and other talented writers have a tidy but thought-provoking cache of film essays.

BLOWN AWAY: 'I’m a sucker for lyrical tragedy. As far as that’s concerned, nothing beats the ending of Brian De Palma’s Blow Out. It’s a movie so ripe with drama and metaphor that it becomes part of your metabolism. When Jack kneels down to hold Sally’s lifeless body in his arms and the fireworks go off in the background, he’s really holding America’s lost innocence. A profound moment; tragic, beautiful and blackly humorous at the same time.'

SOMEWHERE IN TIME: 'I’d love to see two movies a day, but I can’t. When you have a family you love to spend time with and a pile of different interests as I do, time becomes a precious commodity. Fortunately, I can do with little sleep, and as I grow older I get better at cherry picking. Not that I claim to have impeccable taste, but at least I’ve got a pretty good handle on what I’m interested in. On average, I’ll see something like four or five movies a week. Not counting replays of favorite DVD-chapters, TV series, stuff I find on the Web and the tons of footage I see at work.'

NOW PLAYING AT CINEMA GELDERBLOM: 'The female mystique isn’t such an enigma to me as it once was, but it remains an endless source of inspiration. For my personal revival theater, I would program a themed week centered on Fantastique and the Feminine: Georges Franju’s Eyes Without a Face, Jack Clayton’s The Innocents, Peter Weir’s Picnic at Hanging Rock, Paul Verhoeven’s De Vierde Man, Michael Tolkin’s The Rapture, Kathryn Bigelow’s The Weight of Water, David Lynch’s Mulholland Dr. and Julio Medem’s Lucia y el Sexo. The next week would be a Ward Kimball animation festival.'

NATIONAL TREASURE: 'It’s quite impossible to point out a single movie that depicts today’s Dutch culture. I’m afraid Holland is going through something of an identity crisis right now. We’ve got plenty of talent around, but there’s no such thing as a single movement or unique characteristic. What we miss is a front figure like Lars von Trier, who almost single-handedly put Danish cinema back on the map. Paul Verhoeven, whose Zwartboek I loved, spent too much time in Hollywood to be a positive influence here. Willem van de Sande Bakhuysen died of cancer. Alex van Warmerdam continues to make quirky black comedies with a stylish sense of the absurd, but he’s always been something of an anomaly. And our very own enfant terrible Theo van Gogh - who was never that successful to begin with – has been brutally murdered by a Moslim extremist.

'I was very impressed by Guernsey, a gorgeously composed minimalist drama in the vein of Bresson, directed by Nanouk Leopold. I can also recommend Off Screen, a psychological thriller by Pieter Kuijpers based on the real-life hostage inside the Rembrandt tower in Amsterdam--very close to where I used to work. I very much admired the episodic structure of Simon, an euthanasia drama composed of refreshingly short scenes that never become sentimental. To be honest, though, some of the best Dutch cinema appears on television. Series like Oud Geld (written by the massively talented Maria Goos) and Vuurzee come to mind, as well as some really classy commercials.'

THANKS TO THE INTERNETS: 'It’s only natural to be attracted to people with similar interests, but I’ve always felt I loved films just a little bit more than those around me. Even when I started directing, there was this urge to dig deeper. I’m an autodidact on the subject of film - I studied Graphic Arts - so my background has always been practical. Then the World Wide Web came along and everything changed. The Internet sparked a major creative epiphany in me. Suddenly, there was this incredible wealth of information I had access to, with film-dedicated forums, databases and websites pointing me in all the right directions. I’ve been catching up ever since.

'The impetus to write came from not fully recognizing myself in what was already being written. At the time, I frequently became enfuriated by reviews and articles that I believed to be highly unfair, narrow-sighted or misjudged. That’s when I realized that I, in my own screwed-up kinda way, had developed ideas of my own that were worth expressing.

'24LiesASecond is far from prolific, but at least the quality of our essays is consistent. Jim Moran, my editor-in-chief, is one of the most brilliant film scholars on the planet and someone I hold in very high esteem. We started 24Lies in order to provide a platform for provocative film criticism on an academical level, but without the condescending tone. Little did I know what a flight the blogosphere would take in that direction. I’ve often been jealous of Matt Zoller Seitz’s achievements with his expert team of bloggers at The House Next Door. Recently I figured: if you can’t beat ‘em… join ‘m!

'There have been times that I wondered if it was a healthy thing for a creator to be so fascinated by theory and criticism, until I realized that it’s just another form of expression. Filmmaking and film interpretation are two sides of the same coin: Cinema only exists when it is seen.'

DIGITAL BITS: 'The movies that I buy don’t have to be perfect movies as a whole. What really excites me about the medium is the way it encapsulates unique experiences. I like to dip into strange worlds, relive a dramatic moment or relish in a splendidly articulated speech.'

PARADISE GLIMPSED: 'I once saw Famke Janssen’s sister in her underwear. She was changing clothes for a shoot and I accidentally caught a glimpse of what looked like Xenia Onatopp’s deadly thighs.'

TALK LIKE A PEET GELDERBLOM TODAY!: '“It’s not a lie. It’s a gift for fiction.” David Mamet’s State and Main. A priceless quote from a moderately entertaining film.'

BREAK IT DOWN: 'There’s a dinner table scene in Keith Gordon’s Waking the Dead that always gets to me, no matter how much times I see it. It’s a monologue shot in a long zoom on the character played by Billy Crudup, with only a couple of cutaways. Basically, a senator sits down to celebrate with his family and has a mental breakdown right then and there. I only need to read the dialogue to get goosebumps all over:

There's something that I think I should tell you all. I'm not feeling very well. And I haven't been for a while. Something inside me has jumped the track. I'm confused. I'm not thinking right. I'm not sleeping right. And I - just don't think I am complaining about this or asking for your help. Because there's nothing anyone can do about it. It's just happened and that's all there is to it. But I don't know what I'm going to say from one minute to the next. I really don't. I don't know what I'm going to say and I don't know what I'm going to do. Do you understand that? And I know this is coming at a bad time for everyone but there's nothing I can do about that. I'm tired and I'm - I don't see things the way that I used to. Everything, everything, everything is fucking strange and it's all completely out of control and I'm frightened. And maybe if you all could give me some real help, you know? That would be - And not your pity or generosity but some help. Take a look at me. I know that I am ruining everything but I can't - If I don't say this now I may never say it. Everything is going very fast. It's going very, very fast. It's completely out of control. And if I don't say it today, tomorrow may be too late. I may be too crazy to even know how crazy I am. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. Something has happened to me and I'm very lost. And it doesn't stop. It's not getting better. I don't get better. I'm not getting better. It's just going on and it's going on. And there's nothing that I can do about it. It's not stopping. It's not stopping.

'I think we all have thoughts like that at certain points in our life, but most of us prefer to keep them to ourselves. For my money, Billy Crudup is one of the most underrated actors working in America today.'

WHAT ABOUT 'HOT DOG: THE MOVIE'?: 'I’m not one to cherish memorable film years. Emphasizing that 1999 was a great year for movies won’t excuse Universal Soldier 2 from being a piece of shit. And what about movies that were produced in 1999 and released in 2000? They don’t count? In Europe we’re used to seeing Hollywood films half a year later anyway. I’m skeptical about year-best lists for the same reason. What’s the point when it might as well be a film from 1944 that turns out to be a life-changing experience? I’d rather focus on what films I like, regardless of what time they came out.

Having said that: 1984 was when I realized as a teenager how much I was hooked on the movies. I still have a soft spot for Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Body Double, Schatjes!, Greystoke: The Legend of Tarzan, Man of the Apes, Gremlins, The Neverending Story, Starman and Top Secret!'

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