FRIDAY SCREEN TEST: Dylan (aka Fletch)

Call him Dylan, or Fletch, or even Dr. Rosenpenis -- but don't call him easily amused. The man behind Blog Cabins: Insanely Important Film Reviews is one tough critic -- he tosses around the top honor on his splendidly-designed ratings scale like it's the Ultimate Nullifier (wow, where did that come from?). Fletch casts his skeptical eye on many new releases, and also spreads the wealth to television and movies that don't exist. Fletch must also be commended for his philanthropic work on the Web, namely his founding of The Large Association of Movie Blogs (the LAMB). This ever-growing movie blog union brings together some of the smartest people in the world for fun group activities, and generally acts as a great way for film bloggers to network and spread awareness of their sites. Next LAMB project: build a subterranean refuge in case a wayward asteroid deprives our planet of life -- and film critics.

EARLIEST MOVIE-WATCHING MEMORY: 'Since I have a terrible memory as it relates to my childhood, I'm going to be really generic and say that it was watching Star Wars every time I got sick. My mom insists I watched Benji when I was sick, but I don't believe her (and Star Wars just sounds a lot better).'

LAST DVD YOU BOUGHT: 'It was actually a boxed set of Coen Brothers flicks. I already owned Fargo, but getting Miller's Crossing, Blood Simple, Barton Fink and Raising Arizona along with another Fargo for forty bucks sounded like a nice deal to me.'

IF YOU WERE A TCM GUEST PROGRAMMER, WHAT THREE FILMS WOULD YOU CHOOSE TO BEST REPRESENT YOUR TASTES, OR A FAVORITE GENRE OR THEME: 'Well, I ask people on the LAMB to pick their three favorite movies, so I guess I ought to do the same myself, regardless of how unfair of a question it is. I'm going to go with Fletch, Pulp Fiction and Fight Club.'

FAVORITE GROSS-OUT MOMENT: 'It's certainly not a favorite, but the standout gross moment that comes to mind is seeing waaaay too much of Bill Macy's ass in The Cooler.'

WHAT MOVIE ARE YOU ASHAMED TO SAY YOU HAVEN'T SEEN, AND WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE: 'Where to begin? I've been loathed in the past for my take on older movies (though I've given ample reasons why), but I'll narrow it down to It's A Wonderful Life.'

PICK ONE OF THE FOLLOWING FOUR MOVIES AND WRITE TWO SENTENCES ABOUT IT:
The Big Sleep
The Big Bus
The Big Hit -- 'Up until Strange Wilderness, I had never walked out of a movie, but the one that came closest previously was The Big Hit. What an abortion of a movie.'
Shaft's Big Score.

FAVORITE KIND OF MOVIE TO REVIEW: 'Bad ones.'

LAST TIME YOU WERE AT A DRIVE-IN, AND WHAT DID YOU SEE: 'Austin Powers in Goldmember. Though I don't recall watching all that much of it...'

FILM ERA OR GENRE YOU'RE A LITTLE OBSESSED WITH: 'The 90s. Fitting, given my age (31).'

LAST TIME YOU VEHEMENTLY DISAGREED WITH SOMEONE OVER FILM: 'A friend of mine at work, who is likewise a lover of Office Space, has the gaul to say that Idiocracy is one of the worst movies he's ever seen. This coming from a person that loves Con Air and The Rock more than anyone over the age of 14 should be willing to admit.'

FAVORITE BOOK ON FILM: 'Entertainment Weekly. Shoot me - I read more magazines than books.'

DESCRIBE THE FREQUENCY OF YOUR FILM INTAKE: 'At least six movies in theaters per month, and scads more on TV, with a couple rentals thrown in to boot.'

THREE THINGS YOU'VE LEARNED FROM WATCHING MOVIES: 'Never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.

'Brownie points if you know who said that without looking it up.'

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